In my house quiet is hard to come by. With young kids (three quarters of them boys) and a dog, the volume of our house regularly reaches unsafe levels. I often threaten to wear ear plugs, but as most moms know, hearing (or not hearing anything) is part of a mom's anti-danger awareness system which goes on high-alert when your eyes are otherwise occupied, and I can't safely turn that off.
Last week, my parents, bless their angelic souls, had all four of the kids to their house for a week (a whole week!!). They've had two or three of them in the years past, but this year, the youngest is potty trained and they all got to go. It was the first time in 8.5 years I had no children at home with me. And, it was quiet.
There were no truck noises, no fighting, no "Mom! So-and-so won't let me blah-blah-blah". There was no me yelling for them to be quiet only to hear "What?! We can't hear you! We're being to loud!", followed by sounds of my head banging off the wall. Of course there were none of the good noises either: the giggles, silly sayings and sweet "Mom, I love you"s. But... there was quiet.
I almost forgot it existed during the daylight hours.
When it was quiet, I heard the wind in the trees, the birds chirping away, the laundry thumping in the dryer downstairs, and I heard myself think! I went hours without having to speak. No twenty questions to answer, no over dramatic punishments to threaten - "No dessert for a year!". I didn't have to hold a press conference to announce the evenings menu, so I wasn't asked 5 separate times while I was preparing it:
"Thank you for attending this evening's dinner press conference. The menu tonight will be a Roasted Red Pepper Pasta with Chicken, salad and garlic bread. Any questions? --- Yes, you four in the front row."
In unison: "Are there onions in it?"
"No, there are no onions in it." "Yay!"
"Any more questions? Tall guy, that just walked in."
"Pasta, again?!" "Would you like to rephrase that?".
While I was hearing "quiet", I realized I no longer had to listen. As a parent your eyes and ears and nose never turn off. You could be reading a book and still hear the little feet sneaking into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and then smell the pickles as they are being stealthily snatched from their jar. Moms can even wake from the deepest slumber when they hear the flick of the bathroom light switch at 4:18 AM.
Being able to power down from Mom-mode was almost like a vacation for my brain, even if I was still at my desk working. Last week was a gift for me more than it was for the kiddos. Sure, I missed them (less than I thought) and I worried (even more less than I thought -- but my parents are pros at managing kids, they had four of their own not that long ago). We all survived, though the grand-angels halos maybe be a tad tarnished, it's hard to be on your best behavior for a full day, let alone a whole week.
They're home now. The noise has returned. All Mom-systems are "GO". I can only hope that for my parents, the memory of the chaos, exhaustion and overwhelming energy of 4 grandkids will fade like the pain of childbirth over the next few months and they will want the kids to come visit again next summer, for, maybe.... two weeks?
